K, picture tonnes of trumpets playing a really intense staccato note over and over, getting louder and louder each time. Like, brap, brAP, bRAP, BRAPPP. And then…
Explosion noise!!
DUDEBOX IS F****** DEAD V: Return to the Carwash of Doooooom. "V" is the Roman numeral for five by the way. In case you were wondering. It's okay to admit that you were wondering what "V" meant. It means five.
Now since this year we're partying in a random carwash at King & Bathurst, we're gonna try to keep it clean. Not a pun. Kind of a pun. That means you should make sure to avoid dressing up as the Ebola virus because it’s just not very tasteful dog. Resist that urge. It's kind of tacky.
And while we're on the subject, don't wear your regular clothes and say "I'm just doing me bro" cause your costume sucks because you suck because you say things like "I'm just doing me bro." And, if you’re going to be a sexy anything, be a sexy feminist. Here’s how to do it:
-Dress up as whatever you like
-Believe that women deserve to be treated with equal respect and dignity because humanity
-That’s actually it. This is just a bonus bullet point. Hope you enjoyed the ride.
Because you’re probably wondering what the fuck this event even is, allow us to break it down for you. To unpack it a little. To cook it up real nice and cut it into little tiny bite-sized pieces.
Should we do it in all caps with too many exclamation marks though? Hahaha. Why even ask.
HIP HOPPPP!!!!! DANCE HALLLL!!!! BOUNCE!!!! ALL DRINKZ IS 5 BUCKSSSSS!!! HOT PEOPLE!!!! SPOOKY SHIT FROM THE DOLLER STOREEEE!!! New DDBX hatz that are super cool for $25? PEOPLE HASHTAGGING INSTEAD OF MAKING OUT!!!! PEOPLE MAKING OUT INSTEAD OF HASH TAGGING BUT OTHER PEOPLE TAKING PHOTOS OF THEM AND HASHTAGGING THINGS LIKE #thispartyisreallifetinder!!!!!!! I'M JUST DOING ME BRO!!!!
Make sense? Basically it’s gonna be a big ass party in a cool as shit carwash and you’re invited as long as you’re dope and really nice to people but also a little edgy at times. Not too edgy though. Just enough so that people think you're unusual but authentic. Also it’s for charity. Bonus.
SPECIAL GUEST PERFORMANCE BY:
-Get Home Safe
-Derek Wise
-Drew Howard
DJS:
-James "melt your face and eat it" Nightingale https://soundcloud.com/james-redi-mixtapes
-John "super nice to meet you, try some delicious hot sauce" Chetty
https://soundcloud.com/jon-chetty
- YES YES Y'ALL'S Nino Brown & Yes Yes Jill
-Birthday "muthaf*****" Boy
https://soundcloud.com/birthdayboyofficial
DDBX IS F****** DEAD V.
FRIDAY OCTOBER 31ST.
10PM.
$10. 19+.
Planet Car Wash, 689 KING STREET W @ BATHURST, Toronto, ON.
*80% of profits donated to Manifesto Festival of Community and Culture (www.mnfsto.com)
20% reinvested into DDBX (Website)
Friend Request Le Dudebox
Here are a bunch of answers to a bunch of questions.
-There are no advance tickets. Come early because the line will be really big really early.
-it's 19+ and everyone gets ID'd
-it's a cash bar. No cards. No foreign currency. Bring lots of money.
-it's indoors but there will be a smoking area outside
-there is a coat check
-$10 to get in, $5 for all drinks
- here's a map:
Remember, this is for charity so feel free to pay more at the door. Bartender's tips are donated as well so don't be greedy.
Good vibes only. We're nice. If you can't be, please go to the mean party.
xo
DDBX
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